I Want to Quit. Or Do I?

“I could just get a job. I’m good at that. I know how to do that.”

Yesterday, during a client breakthrough session, we were talking about her coaching business.

She plans. Gets excited. Plans some more.

But when it’s time to actually invite someone to work with her, the questions start creeping in.

What if they judge me? What if I don’t deliver enough value? Who am I to do this?

Suddenly, getting a job sounds like a much easier option.

She knows how to succeed there. She knows the rules. She knows what’s expected.

But she also knows she feels called to coach.

And underneath all that planning and second-guessing is an old, familiar story:

I'm not enough. Why bother? It never works out for me.

Is Your Comfort Zone Really That Comfortable?

We often call this place our “comfort zone.”

But I have a question.

How comfortable is it, really?

Is it comfortable to keep putting off something that matters deeply to you?

To end another week with a beautiful plan but no action?

To wonder what might happen if you actually gave yourself a chance?

Here's what I've come to realize:

Just because something is familiar doesn't mean it's comfortable.

Sometimes what we call our comfort zone is actually our survival zone.

It's the place where we know how to operate. Where we can predict the outcome. Where we don't have to risk being judged, rejected, or discovering that we might not be as good at something as we'd hoped.

It's familiar.

And familiar can be pretty damn uncomfortable.

Believe me, I know.

Oh, Hell No. We Are Not Done Here!

For decades, I've dreamed of speaking on stages.

This past year, I've invested in speaking programs and hired two speaking strategists to help me develop my talks and delivery.

I've practiced. Rewritten. Received critiques. Practiced some more.

And I've wanted to quit more times than I care to admit.

I have a history of getting completely unraveled in the days leading up to a speaking engagement.

Jessica has asked me on more than one occasion, "You know you don't have to speak. If it stresses you out this much, why do you do it?"

Fair question, right? 😂

But here's the thing.

Every time I imagine walking away from speaking, something deep inside me plants both feet firmly on the ground and says:

"OH, HELL NO. WE ARE NOT DONE HERE!"

Because I have something to say.

I have a message I believe can change lives.

And at my core, I KNOW I'm called to be on that stage.

That doesn't make every step easy.

But it does make the steps worth taking.

Sometimes Quitting IS the Right Decision

Now, before you think I'm suggesting we should all push through every challenge and never quit, let me share another story.

Recently, Jessica was coaching a woman who had retired after 30 years in business.

She'd started pursuing coaching but was exhausted, overwhelmed, caring for two family members, and struggling to get her business going.

Jessica asked her a simple question.

"Do you actually WANT to be a coach?"

Her answer was immediate.

"No."

Jessica replied, "Then don't coach."

And the relief was palpable.

Ahhhhh.

She'd been trying so hard to make herself want something she didn't actually want.

Sometimes the most powerful decision we can make is to go ALL IN on our dream.

And sometimes it's giving ourselves permission to walk away.

The magic is in telling ourselves the truth.

I Don't Want to Quit My Dream. I Want to Quit the Struggle.

This is where I've had my own realization.

I'm exhausted by the tug-of-war between wanting my dream and wondering whether I have what it takes to live it.

The second-guessing.

The overthinking.

The constant questioning of whether I'm enough.

I've spent so much energy wrestling with those thoughts that sometimes I've made the process harder than it needs to be.

And here's the truth:

I don't want to quit speaking. I want to quit the struggle I've created around speaking.

There's a BIG difference.

I'm the one who decides whether "not enough" keeps having a vote.

So I'm making a decision FOR my dream.

And I'm backing that decision with action.

Right now, I'm preparing talks, building slides, rewriting, receiving critiques, rehearsing, and being stretched in ways I haven't experienced before.

I'm being held accountable.

Actually, let me own that.

I'm holding MYSELF accountable in ways I haven't before.

And yes, there's work involved. Some days it's hard.

But I'm noticing how much harder I make it when every revision becomes evidence that I'm not good enough.

When I spend more energy questioning my ability than practicing my delivery.

When I forget WHY I wanted this in the first place.

Becoming the Woman Who Owns the Stage

Here's what I'm learning.

The version of me who keeps looking for proof she's enough cannot keep making every decision if I want to become the woman who confidently owns the stage.

That woman doesn't wait until she's perfect.

She rehearses.

She receives feedback.

She's willing to be seen while she's still growing.

She trusts that her message has value before everyone applauds.

And she understands that confidence doesn't necessarily come before action.

Sometimes confidence is what we develop BECAUSE we take action.

I'm not waiting to become that woman before I step onto the stage. I'm becoming her BY stepping onto the stage.

And that feels unfamiliar.

But I'm willing.

So, What About YOUR Dream?

Maybe you're building a business.

Maybe you're considering a career change.

Maybe there's a book inside you, a conversation you've been avoiding, or an entirely different life you've been imagining.

And maybe you've been hovering between wanting it and questioning whether you have what it takes.

I want to invite you to ask yourself one very important question:

Do I REALLY want this?

Give yourself permission to answer honestly.

If the answer is no, you're allowed to release it.

You don't have to keep pursuing something simply because you once decided you should.

But if the answer is YES?

Then ask yourself:

What am I willing to do THIS WEEK to honor that yes?

Make the invitation.

Schedule the conversation.

Practice the talk.

Write the first page.

Take the step you've been avoiding.

You don't have to feel completely ready.

You don't have to have it all figured out.

And you certainly don't have to prove you're enough before you begin.

But you do have to give your dream something more than another beautiful plan.

Your dream needs YOU.

And perhaps the biggest shift isn't deciding whether to quit.

Perhaps it's deciding to stop quitting on yourself.

See you from the stage! 🎤

❤️ Michelle